“A married man should forget his mistakes; no use two people remembering the same thing.”
Duane Dewel
“I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.”
Rodney Dangerfield
“Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel.”
Leonardo Di Vinci
“I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.”
Zsa Zsa Gabor
“Don’t marry for money. You can borrow it cheaper.”
Scotts Proverb
“He’s the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of”
Mae West
“When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.”
Sacha Guitry
“My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.”
Rodney Dangerfield
“Basically my wife was immature. I’d be at home in the bath and she’d come in and sink my boats.”
Woody Allen
“The proper basis for a marriage is mutual misunderstanding”
Oscar Wilde
“Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same”
Oscar Wilde
“Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly.”
Voltaire
“An open marriage is nature’s way of telling you that you need a divorce.”
Ann Landers
“Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who’ll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you’re in the wrong house, that’s what it means.”
George Burns
“The most dangerous food is wedding cake”
American Proverb
“Life is a bitch, and then you marry one”
Author Unknown
“My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea.”
Henny Youngman
“All tragedies are finished by a death, all comedies by a marriage.”
Lord Byron
“How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive”
Oscar Wilde
“How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being.”
Oscar Wilde
